Forgiveness

First posted on Paperclippings.com on Tuesday, December 23, 2008

What do you say to someone who says that you may write one last time but that they will not respond? For a year and a half I contemplated this very subject because I was given that directive as a long time friend had walked away.

I knew that I could not waste words. I knew that I had one chance. Then I heard a song that I had heard many times before. But this time I really heard it.

The following are from The Living Years by Mike and the Mechanics:

Crumpled bits of paper
Filled with imperfect thoughts
Stilted conversations
I'm afraid thats all we've got.

You say you just don't see it
He says it's perfect sense
You just can't get agreement
In this present tense
We all talk a different language
Talking in defense.

Say it loud, say it clear
You can listen as well as you hear
It's too late when we die
To admit we don't see eye to eye.

So we open up a quarrel
Between the present and the past
We only sacrifice the future
It's the bitterness that lasts.

So don't yield to the fortunes
You sometimes see as fate
It may have a new perspective
On a different day
And if you don't give up, and don't give in
You may just be okay.

Say it loud, say it clear
You can listen as well as you hear
It's too late when we die
To admit we don't see eye to eye.

When I heard these words I realized that I no longer held any hard or ill feelings toward my friend. I knew what I had to say.

This past November I penned the words from my heart and sent them off. I wondered if they would even be read or if they would be tossed to the side without a look. But I knew that I had to send them anyway.

This last Saturday I got a Christmas card in the mail. It didn't say much. But is spoke volumes. It didn't even say how they were doing. But as I think more and more about that card I realize that my sadness has also gone away. My friend had read my words. My friend had responded.

I may not get more than a Christmas card in the years to come, but I have not completely lost my friend.

I have learned that with a little bit of forgiveness it is not the bitterness that lasts.